Regrets

I was thinking about my regrets today, and most of them stem from my mom’s death. What I regret most of all are the things that I never asked her about. I never asked her what she saw herself doing in her life when she was my age. I never asked her what it was like to find out that she was pregnant for the first time. I never asked her if she was nervous about having children. I feel sad that there are so many questions that I don’t have answers to. I wish that I knew what my mom’s dreams were for my sister and I. I wish I knew the places she wanted to go in her life. i think that more than anything, I regret not asking her if she was scared to die. I wonder about all of these things because no one can really answer for her. Sometimes I get angry at myself for not asking her all of these things, but then I think that maybe we both would have felt even worse if I had. I guess I will never know the answer to that, and lots of other things.
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One thought on “Regrets

  1. Hy doll face – I started a blog a while back and wasn’t sure where it was going, but now I am telling you. It’s lovelysea – like my old aol and I wote something today I wanted you to read because I really need to talk about it and your my best and most loving friend. It’ll be easier if you read it and then we can talk. I love reading your blog so much. You are such a beautiful sensitive individual and I love the way you talk about yourself because I know those thngs about you and it reminds me of your mom so much. I feel like I am reading something she would have written.

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